Money fast #3

Now salivating over the Cath Kidston sales catalogue and a limited edition Tesco shopper I didn't even know I needed, I phone FNF with a new strategy in mind.

“Have you bought me a birthday present yet?" I ask. "Would you like to buy me some clothes on the internet?”
“No,” he says, in a tone which does not encourage My Eco Self to persevere. “What about underripe apricots then?” remembering the contents of that week’s vegetable box. “Is there anything inspiring I can do with them?”
“Apricots, mmm….” FNF almost groans down the phone.
Typical, I think. While I’m living like a nun, in last season’s clothes, FNF is having an orgasmic fit over an apricot.

“Can I come round for dinner?” I ask, “I’ve don't have anything to eat except vanilla extract and apricots?”
“But that’s a perfect combination” he says, “stewed with a touch of orange juice and sugar.”

I manage to secure myself a dinner invitation as long as I bring the apricots.

“If you had to give something up, what would it be?” I ask him later, through a mouthful of watermelon, feta and mint salad.*
“Women,” he responds without a pause.
An unlikely response. “Have you fallen out with your girlfriend?”

“No,” he replies through pursed lips.
“They’re giving away free energy-saving light bulbs at the supermarket,” I tell him in a faint attempt to cheer him up, my relationship counselling skills rejected. It doesn’t seem to hit the spot.

*There's a recipe for the salad here. Although I usually just artfully arrange the three main ingredients. One of my fellow bloggers, Artichoke, has written about apricots this week. Apparently there are some English producers. Not sure if the same can be said about watermelons, but ours wasn't air-freighted and the salad was delicious.